So now that I have the job, what is it that motivates me to continue studying?
I have been wondering this question for the last few weeks with not definate answer. Of course I want to learn something from this degree, but I have found that there are not that many new ideas that come out in the MA level. It is just the same theories and models done with more mathematical rigor. At this point, I would be very happy just to be done with the whole thing so I can move on.
Winter is also starting to get me down. Snow is pretty cool, and it looks nice, but since it started falling over a month ago it has not melted, even for a day. The weather outside is opressively cold in a very real way. I am loth to go outside if I don't have to. I won't go downtown or even to Princess street to eat if I am at school. I don't much enjoy the act of walking anymore, which to me is a big loss because walking has been one of my great joys for years now. I live in hope that spring is just around the corner and that it will be greatly enjoyable. Most of all, I understand even more deeply why everyone wants to move to Vancouver.
I have started taking Chinese lessons again. 因为我怕我的中文会退步所以我去了皇后大学中文系找汉语家教。家教不错。他的教育方法不是特别有效但是他陪我读书而且帮助我学标准的声调。我发现有家教我就比较认真的学习。当然她不会跟小蓓蓓比。现在我不怕退步，我就怕工作没有机会用汉语。。。我到Ottawa的时候我要跟何莲花联系。他一定认识政府内面的很多中国人。如果我能进入他们华人的互联网络我可能会有根多机会讲汉语。其实我有一点败兴没有私人公司对我中文能力感兴趣。他们不想跟中国人做生意吗？。。。
I am going to NY on tuesday. It should be fun. Vincent is going to be in town, and I will get to see Jesse and Will and maybe some other UNIS people. It is my first time going there since my parents left and I will not have an apartment to live in. I think in some way, it makes me much less of a New Yorker. I can no longer use the excuse that I am there to visit my parents rather than going as a tourist. Looking forward, I think it is unlikely that I will spend as much time there as I have in the past. Without them to see I doubt I will go every year, even if I am in Ottawa.
Going to NY also brings up the (at least temporary) death of my dream of living in New York again. I am not sure exactly what it would take to allow me to do that, but now that I am starting on the government track, the opportunities are far fewer indeed. I will never work on Wall Street and the UN is still a long shot. More importantly, with my parents gone I don't have a base from which to search for jobs.
Now that I have vented my unhappyness, I will try to put some optimism in my blog, something which has been pointed out to me as severly lacking. The job I got in the government is the job that everyone wanted. By that criteria alone, I should say that it is a good job. My latent fears that the job will fall through (something that has been ingrained in my through my upbringing...) have been somewhat allayed by all of the hoops I have had to jump through with my background check information. You don't realise how many things you have done or places you have been until you are asked to account for all of them over a ten year period. Hopefully the information I gave will help them clear me faster (although all the time in China might be somewhat suspicious to them) so I can start work on time in June.
I am looking forward to moving to Ottawa. Admittedly it is not my first choice of cities to live in but, being born there, I have deep roots in the city. Also, I have some friends around, especially Ashley, who will make the transition easier. The feeling I got from Ottawa the last few times that I have been there is that it is a major government town, which is not a bad thing when you work for government. Like Toronto, it is a magnet for people from all over the country who want to work for the federal government which is nice because it should give some diversity. I can't say that the food is so great, but it is certainly better than Kingston, so it should be a relief if nothing else.
Another encouraging development is the success that many of my friends have been enjoying in their short post-graduation carreers. I guess the real world is not that bad. Congratulations Noah on your promotion! You show that there is hope for an Arts grad who wants to live in Vancouver and still make money.
I have been wondering this question for the last few weeks with not definate answer. Of course I want to learn something from this degree, but I have found that there are not that many new ideas that come out in the MA level. It is just the same theories and models done with more mathematical rigor. At this point, I would be very happy just to be done with the whole thing so I can move on.
Winter is also starting to get me down. Snow is pretty cool, and it looks nice, but since it started falling over a month ago it has not melted, even for a day. The weather outside is opressively cold in a very real way. I am loth to go outside if I don't have to. I won't go downtown or even to Princess street to eat if I am at school. I don't much enjoy the act of walking anymore, which to me is a big loss because walking has been one of my great joys for years now. I live in hope that spring is just around the corner and that it will be greatly enjoyable. Most of all, I understand even more deeply why everyone wants to move to Vancouver.
I have started taking Chinese lessons again. 因为我怕我的中文会退步所以我去了皇后大学中文系找汉语家教。家教不错。他的教育方法不是特别有效但是他陪我读书而且帮助我学标准的声调。我发现有家教我就比较认真的学习。当然她不会跟小蓓蓓比。现在我不怕退步，我就怕工作没有机会用汉语。。。我到Ottawa的时候我要跟何莲花联系。他一定认识政府内面的很多中国人。如果我能进入他们华人的互联网络我可能会有根多机会讲汉语。其实我有一点败兴没有私人公司对我中文能力感兴趣。他们不想跟中国人做生意吗？。。。
I am going to NY on tuesday. It should be fun. Vincent is going to be in town, and I will get to see Jesse and Will and maybe some other UNIS people. It is my first time going there since my parents left and I will not have an apartment to live in. I think in some way, it makes me much less of a New Yorker. I can no longer use the excuse that I am there to visit my parents rather than going as a tourist. Looking forward, I think it is unlikely that I will spend as much time there as I have in the past. Without them to see I doubt I will go every year, even if I am in Ottawa.
Going to NY also brings up the (at least temporary) death of my dream of living in New York again. I am not sure exactly what it would take to allow me to do that, but now that I am starting on the government track, the opportunities are far fewer indeed. I will never work on Wall Street and the UN is still a long shot. More importantly, with my parents gone I don't have a base from which to search for jobs.
Now that I have vented my unhappyness, I will try to put some optimism in my blog, something which has been pointed out to me as severly lacking. The job I got in the government is the job that everyone wanted. By that criteria alone, I should say that it is a good job. My latent fears that the job will fall through (something that has been ingrained in my through my upbringing...) have been somewhat allayed by all of the hoops I have had to jump through with my background check information. You don't realise how many things you have done or places you have been until you are asked to account for all of them over a ten year period. Hopefully the information I gave will help them clear me faster (although all the time in China might be somewhat suspicious to them) so I can start work on time in June.
I am looking forward to moving to Ottawa. Admittedly it is not my first choice of cities to live in but, being born there, I have deep roots in the city. Also, I have some friends around, especially Ashley, who will make the transition easier. The feeling I got from Ottawa the last few times that I have been there is that it is a major government town, which is not a bad thing when you work for government. Like Toronto, it is a magnet for people from all over the country who want to work for the federal government which is nice because it should give some diversity. I can't say that the food is so great, but it is certainly better than Kingston, so it should be a relief if nothing else.
Another encouraging development is the success that many of my friends have been enjoying in their short post-graduation carreers. I guess the real world is not that bad. Congratulations Noah on your promotion! You show that there is hope for an Arts grad who wants to live in Vancouver and still make money.
