School goes on. I am becoming increasingly sure that this will be my final degree. Although I am finding student life interesting, and it is nice to be more independent, I don't think that PhD is something I want to do.

It is tough to be without real friends. Of course, I like my roommate and my classmates, but I have only known them for a very short time, far too short to consider them real friends. Also, the nature of the program is that there is interaction with a large group of people but for a pretty specific set of things. There are no great bonding experiences like group travel or other special events. Maybe this is just part of growing up. The more you get to know yourself, the less you have in common with those around you. Years ago, there was a time when skateboarding and listening to punk music was a good basis for a friendship. Now, I don't even know what would be. Perhaps the toughest part is that as my friends scatter to various places around the world, it becomes hard to find a place where I feel I am with good friends. Even Vancouver has lost many of my friends lately, although it still retains some very good ones.

It feels like I have been in school a long time now, but I still haven't even finished midterms. I am already feeling stress and fatigue like I very rarely felt in undergrad. Maybe my undergrad was just too easy. My last year at UBC was so fun, but that was partly because my course load was such a joke. Now all my classes are serious, rigorous, and much deeper than anything I have done before. I guess I was expecting this... On the plus side, it has certainly not been boring or routine.