I went to work today. It was interesting. Well... it was the same as it always is. I started the day by counting how many more work days until September and then thought about whether I should just quit my job once I find out whether I can get a student loan. I decided that I probably should so that I can at least enjoy some part of the summer without the fatigue, frustration, and soul crushing boredom of my 9-5. The problem is that I don't know how much money I can get as a loan and I don't really know how much living in Kingston will cost.
I don' t know if I am still getting anything out of my job. Seeing the appraisals is cool, but it is a relatively minor part of my day and anyway most of them are for cookie cutter homes in suburban Alberta. The work environment is really getting to me. It is so static. In my cubicle, I am surrounded by people with whom I have very little in common. No matter how well I sleep, I am worn out by the end of the day. Not physically worn out, but somehow I am mentally dulled and weary. Going home provides some comfort but also tension in being stuck between my attention craving mother and my detached and withdrawn father. The apartment is no longer mine in any way that matters other than my continued right to sleep here.
Things have not been going well with Rae either. I have been finding that she has been bailing on our plans and spending most of her time with her friends without even thinking of inviting me along. Now she has friends visiting from Taiwan and she is showing them all the fun stuff without me. Maybe she is sending me a message.
I saw Blair yesterday. An old friend, Harry, has just moved here from Sydney and we took him to a punk bar that had a half pipe in it. He was very impressed and skated well. Seeing him also highlighted for me how much I have changed in the seven years since I have been here.
I had lunch with Noah today. He is having girl problems too, but different ones than mine. He is also bored with his job and has been trying to find something else. I think Vancouver is a hard city in which to find good work. There is plenty of work, just not that much that I am both qualified for and interested in doing. Maybe I just don't know how to look.
I just got back from a walk with my sister. It is nice that we can do things like that now that we don't live together. I am happy that we are getting along so well and relating more as friends than as kids.
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I don' t know if I am still getting anything out of my job. Seeing the appraisals is cool, but it is a relatively minor part of my day and anyway most of them are for cookie cutter homes in suburban Alberta. The work environment is really getting to me. It is so static. In my cubicle, I am surrounded by people with whom I have very little in common. No matter how well I sleep, I am worn out by the end of the day. Not physically worn out, but somehow I am mentally dulled and weary. Going home provides some comfort but also tension in being stuck between my attention craving mother and my detached and withdrawn father. The apartment is no longer mine in any way that matters other than my continued right to sleep here.
Things have not been going well with Rae either. I have been finding that she has been bailing on our plans and spending most of her time with her friends without even thinking of inviting me along. Now she has friends visiting from Taiwan and she is showing them all the fun stuff without me. Maybe she is sending me a message.
I saw Blair yesterday. An old friend, Harry, has just moved here from Sydney and we took him to a punk bar that had a half pipe in it. He was very impressed and skated well. Seeing him also highlighted for me how much I have changed in the seven years since I have been here.
I had lunch with Noah today. He is having girl problems too, but different ones than mine. He is also bored with his job and has been trying to find something else. I think Vancouver is a hard city in which to find good work. There is plenty of work, just not that much that I am both qualified for and interested in doing. Maybe I just don't know how to look.
I just got back from a walk with my sister. It is nice that we can do things like that now that we don't live together. I am happy that we are getting along so well and relating more as friends than as kids.
...
2 Comments:
Hi there,
The people with small town homes...at least have saved up their salaries to buy a house..and could use it to buy their freedom back (like rent out their place / use their house as collateral for another house to be rented out).
They have diversified their income streams.. I think..they are quite smart..and decided to go for 100% certain future gains...instead of betting on (or worse: ONLY on)an uncertain future of career that may never materialize to the extent they thought it would.
A modest reader.
Hi,
I would not be too surprised if your girl has finished 'using'your in depth know-how in western culture/behaviour..and is now basically going to implement it all by herself. Its not entirely coincidence that asians tend to intermarry.. but as much as possible with asians, since they are perceived by their community as 'unsuccesful'when they can'only'find a non-asian. She doesnt want people to feel sorry for her..and.. is quite ambitious?
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